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Am I forgiving or ??? - what is the opposite?

NOTE: Today is many days, perhaps three months, since I started the post below... Certainly other posts are dated early January, 2020... and today is April 10, 2020 - the second day of Passover, the 2nd day of the Jewish New Year of Spring, and the day I have asserted (promised) I would write in a regular, routine, disciplined fashion. Here I go... again !

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Am I forgiving? Forgiveness is considered a good thing to do. I didn't quickly come to a word or two for its opposite. A simple search of google quickly suggested -:merciless and vindictive to be the opposite of forgiveness and a link to many, many more words/ideas that are the opposite of forgiving . Try this, too. Another look might be to consider the word forgive and what are its opposites and synonyms? HERE at Word hippo are many options!

AND today (as of this new writing) -- Holding a GRUDGE seems to be an opposite and one can do that by acting out and attacking others (be vindictive) or by "acting in" by which I mean feeling bad myself and do that thing described as: holding the hot ash of anger in my hand and thinking it is hurting the other person" - which is absurd, right?!

On the side of forgiveness are words and ideas to free one from actions/ideas of others while the opposite of forgiveness are words/ideas which seem to bind two parties into possible hurtful actions. 

SO - the issue is respect or acceptance or toleration of each other with a recognition, I would think/add - that no one is perfectly clear and right for everyone.

As Rabbi Hillel said - "Do not unto others what you would not like done unto you"... An alternate sounding aphorism to "love one another as you would like to be loved" or "do unto others as you would have other do unto you".. I think the "do NOT" phrasing is better and easier because I think it is more clear what is wrong and hurtful to do or have done while how one is loved or what one wants done to/for me... is harder for others to always determine. 

Forgiving is good for me/one personally. It may also be good for the other. I do think forgiveness is best served warmly to a good apology.  A grudge may lead to vengeance which they say is best served up cold... WELL - warmth in relationships is better then coldness and doing things sooner rather than later is better, too, I think. Do not delay in being good!


(and check my basic thought about choices by clicking here)

  © Ken Firestein - 2020

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